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Edward
“Edward, are
you ready?” Mom asked. She was a vision standing there by the door in her cream
colored satin gown.
With a smile, I
got up, walking over to the full length mirror in the corner of the room. I
checked my suit one last time before making my way out there. Running my hands
over it, I smiled. You always said only the best for me. So a Gucci suit
should’ve been no surprise for this occasion.
“Yeah, Mom, I’m
ready,” I said, and together, we left the luxurious bedroom behind.
When I stepped
outside, I was in awe. Everything was so well put together. It was all
exquisite. Every single person that meant something to us was here for this.
Your family, my mom, they were all here to wish us the best. However, as time
ticked away, I grew more nervous.
Never in a
million years did I ever dream that this could happen to me. That I could be
standing here on this day ready to devote my life to another, but it was you.
You made it happen.
I was only
nineteen years old when we met. I had just gotten my first pair of glasses, and
I felt so out of place. I’d never worn glasses before in my life. However, after a bout of complaining that I
couldn’t see the board in class, watery eyes, cloudy vision, and this constant
haze, I finally went to the optician. In the end, the bottom line was, I needed
glasses.
This didn’t
help my self-esteem one bit. Mom didn’t wear them, and I felt so out of place. I
had already felt like such a geek amongst my peers at Berkeley. Not to mention that I was already viewed as
one for majoring in Physics during my time there. I had no true friends and I
wasn’t exactly the most desirable guy to the guys I was interested in. All they
saw was the reddish freaky hair and my lanky figure. Now I had to add glasses
to the mix. No guy would be caught dead on a date with Edward Cullen, the nerd.
Being gay
wasn’t as much a stigma here in California as it was in the little town I was
from, Forks, Washington. There, I was known as the only child of Esme Platt,
divorcee. Everyone seemed to care about the fact that my mom was divorced more
than anything else until I made the mistake of telling a guy at school that I
liked him. Admittedly, I was tricked into saying it after receiving what I
thought were messages from him. Thankfully, I didn’t have my ass handed to me,
but everyone kind of stayed away. I felt like I was diseased so I promised
myself that college would be different, but so far, it was only cool on the
being gay front. Not the dating one.
So when Mom
took a job out here in California after getting an offer from an Interior
Design agency, I couldn't have been happier. The move came at the right time
for us, as I had applied to attend any school far from Forks and the small town
gossip.
Any action I had
hoped to get out here was minimal, and I was beginning to think it would never
happen. So instead of sitting around moping, I found my solace in books.
Mom was earning
enough for both of us to live comfortably, but I wanted my own money. I wanted
a job that was both beneficial to my intellect and something I would enjoy
doing. It was then I began my search and it lead me to get a job in one of my
mom’s good friend, Rosalie Hale’s, bookstore.
It was a great
place to work. All the books I could read, and a great atmosphere. I enjoyed
going to work every day. I was happy.
At least I
thought I was until I met you.
It had been an unusually
hot and my shirt was already sticking to my skin. I walked into the bookstore,
the bell above the door dinging, alerting Rosalie of someone’s presence.
She came from
around the back, her hands filled with books. “Hey, Edward, a little help
please.”
“Hey, Rosalie.”
I dropped my things by the door, and ran to help. Together, we put the books
away, and I took my position behind the counter. I checked the coffee pot and
Rosalie set out fresh muffins for whatever potential customers we might get
today.
“So, you ready
for today?” Rosalie joked, looking around the quaint little store.
“Yes.” I
smiled. The store might have been small, but we had a lot of customers passing
through here during business hours. But
you were the first to make my breath stop.
This was the
first day of the rest of my life, and I never truly understood that phrase
until you walked in the store.
About an hour
after arriving at work, I was dealing with an obnoxious customer. Admittedly, I
was annoyed and trying hard not to show it, but a quick glance by the door and
I was lost forever.
You stepped in.
You were dress to the ‘t’ you suit was expensive by the looks of it and you
looked really familiar, but I couldn’t place it.
My breath
caught, when you looked my way. Your eyes peered into mine before quickly
looking away, releasing me from their hold. Rosalie came out and was an apparent
witness to our first glance. She stepped up to me with a smile and sent me over
to you, before handling the customer herself.
I was nervous.
You were…breathtaking. Your tailored suit fit you like a glove. I had to take a
deep breath to calm myself down. I wanted to be able to not fall all over
myself while talking to you.
I stopped at
your table by the window, the sun making your blond tresses that stopped at the
nape of your neck seemingly shine in the light. Your eyes were worse as they
once again held captive while I tried to speak.
“Hey, I’m
Edward, what can I get you?”
“Hi there,
how’s your coffee, Edward?” The side of your mouth lifted with a slight smirk,
and I wanted to melt. My heart was pounding, my hands were clammy. The deep
southern accent you spoke with, was so damn alluring, I was having a hard time
not asking you to speak again, just to hear you.
“The best in
town.” I smiled, my heart racing, but I was proud of myself to get those words
out, without a stutter.
“Alright then,”
You said, again with that smirk. “Can I get a cup?”
“I’ll be back
in a minute.”
That was the
first of many days.
You were there
every lunch time that week. I learned that you even came in on days when I
wasn’t there because of classes. Rosalie
finally got tired of watching you sit there with that longing look on your face
so she inquired and you were not shy to tell her that you were there for me.
She was both appalled and impressed by your bravery to readily admit that. So
she asked for more information. You gave her a card, and I learned that you
were, you were Jasper Whitlock, 29 years old, prominent lawyer at one of the
best law firms in the state of California.
She then told
you that I was Edward Cullen, who aspired to be a physicist.
I should have
been angry with her for that, but you lived in my every thought, and I was
overjoyed to learn of your interest in me. Edward the nerd. I looked up on Google,
and was surprised to know that you were one of the best. You never lost a case.
You were the most sought after and also well known for being quite the player
on the dating scene. You were openly gay and proud, but as much as this was a
brownie point in my book, I couldn’t get over the ‘player’ bit. You liked
young, attractive guys so what did you see in me?
However, I
would’ve been lying if I didn’t say I wasn’t curious about you, the person, and
not what I read. I wanted to know you, and I wanted you to know me. And that we
did.
On every day I
worked, you came in. And every day, it would be the same. Just a cup of coffee,
sometimes a muffin and you’d select a book to buy and then sit and read.
Sometimes, I wondered with all I read about you, where did you find the time
for this? Until one day, you asked me to join you.
“Why don’t you
join me?” You had said. It was slow day and I asked for a break, which Rosalie
was more than willing to give.
“Thanks,” I
answered. “But don’t you want your cup of coffee and muffin first?”
“Yes,” You smiled.
“Thanks.”
After returning
with coffee and the muffin, I got the same for myself. You eyed me, and I did the same. You smiled,
and I did the same. So it began, the first of many coffees and muffins, just so
we could sit and talk.
Every day I
thought about you until I saw you. Every day I would learn that there was more
to you than what I’d found out on the internet. And every night, I would dream
of you.
First, they
were innocent dreams, just of your smile, your laugh or the way you would run
your hand through your hair then smile. That was my favorite. Then the dreams
would change, and I began to wonder what your body looked like underneath those
clothes. Night after night, I would wrap my hand around my cock, pumping it
until I came, screaming your name.
Those nights, I
was thankful that I had my own apartment.
Then one day
over our usual coffee and talk, it happened. It was a simple touch, the first
touch, but I never forgot it. I couldn’t because I felt like I had died and
gone to heaven. Your hand on mine was electric, literally. We’d both jumped and
pulled away from the shock, but the tension between us forced us to touch once
again. The static was still there, but it had lessened and I was grateful as I
didn’t want to let go.
You looked me
in the eye and I never forgot these words. “Would you like to go out with me?”
I was nervous.
What was I doing standing outside my place waiting for you to pick me up? I had
agreed to the date, but should I have? Not only were you a well known bachelor,
and one of the most sought after, you were also at least ten years my senior. You
could be taking advantage of me. I had morals. I wasn’t stupid. I wouldn’t be
saying yes to anything I wasn’t comfortable with, no matter how tingly you made
me feel. Would I?
Nonetheless,
the bottom line was, I didn’t care. I was foolishly falling for you.
It turned out I
was scared and second guessing myself and you for no reason as you were the
perfect gentleman on our first date, as you continued to be on the three that
followed.
Four dates. It
took four dates for you to kiss me. I’d never been with a man before. Yes, I
knew I was gay and I fully understood my preference, but I lacked sexual
experience and that worried me most of all, but you never pressured me. You
never pushed. You waited. And finally, one night while I was over at your place
during a movie, I got my first kiss.
When you pulled
away, I shared that it was, and you smiled brightly, saying, “And this will be
your second.” Before pressing your lips to mine.
Life wasn’t
always so easy for us though. But by the time, everyone found out, your family,
your colleagues, my mom, we were in love and inseparable. Nothing could change
our minds about each other. Others warned me to stay away from you, some tried
to take me away from you, manipulate us, but you held strong and I loved you
even more for it.
We were happy.
I told you
everything. You knew me inside and out. As I knew you. I was the geek on the
outside, that you were on the inside. I was the boy you loved, and sometimes
we’d argue over that, because I couldn’t see myself as the man you lived for. I
hated that we were stuck, sexually. I feared moving on. Would it hurt? Yes.
Would...what would we do? I knew the mechanics but have never experienced
anything outside of my hand until you.
Nonetheless,
again, you took your time again. You pleased me. You treasured me. You ensured
that I was well sated, without even wanting me to reciprocate at times. How
selfless you were.
Yet, I learned.
From the first
touch of my hand against your hard cock, to the first time I tasted you. I
learned and memorized while being mesmerized in each moment.
You were the
air I breathe.
You told me you
couldn’t be without me, and that you felt the same longing and heartache I felt
whenever you had to drive me home as I did when I had to close the door behind
you, so I moved in. Life was life. We had to learn to share space and co-exist.
Nevertheless, it was also sweeter, because it was with you.
Beauty.
It was
everything you were in that moment. It was in the way you held me, how you told
me you love me. The way you used your body to make my first sexual experience
the most pleasure filled experience I’d ever had in my life.
Nothing could
come close to what it felt like to have you inside of me. To have you within
the depths of me. To feel my body accepting you despite the pain. To sigh in
relief when you started to move. Your fingers wrapped tightly around mine,
lending me the support I needed. Your lips at my ear, whispered treasured words
of love to me. Your body, giving, receiving, pushing, pulling. I cry, you wipe
the tears away, I scream, grunt and moan, and you were there, biting, kissing
and encouraging me. Loving me. Making love to me. Giving me all of you.
Your eyes water
before me now as do my mom’s, when I look over at her. Our guests are silent
and sniffling their quiet tears, but I had to tell you in my own words, Jasper,
how I felt.
You look me in
the eyes, smiling as the tears ran down your cheeks and said, “I love you,
Edward Anthony Cullen, from the first day I met you. I will continue to love
you until the day I die and forevermore. You are my light, and the air I
breathe. The day I walked into that coffeehouse and saw you, it made me whole.
I might have been a selfish man, but I had to have you.” I smiled at his words,
and how true they were. Jasper fought for what he wanted, and he never let go
once he had it. “Walking away that first day, I swore to myself that there would
be no other. I have a past and you know this, but still you accepted me
wholeheartedly.”
More sniffles
could be heard during his vows, but I kept my eyes solely on the man I loved,
who asked me to marry him the day after my graduation from college.
“My life is now
complete because you’re in it. I love you with all my heart, body and soul,”
Jasper said.
The minister
then said the words that will forever be imprinted on my memories. “By the
power vested in me in the state of New York, I now pronounce you, husband and
husband. Gentlemen, you may kiss your
husband.”
The cheers of
our guests were overlapping, but the touch of his lips made the cheerful noise
fade away.
He moved away, sighing
before his face lit up with a smile. “It was you.”
“What?” I
whispered curiously.
“I always felt
like I was waiting for something. Now I know what it was,” he said with a
smile. “It was you.”
“Well, you’ve
found me, and you’ll have me forever.”
“I couldn’t be
happier.” He smiled. “And life couldn’t be sweeter.”
He was wrong,
it could be, and when we adopted our daughter two years later, and our son a
year after, it was now truly sweeter.
My life was now
complete. The once nerdy guy that no one would consider was now husband and
father to two of the smartest, craziest yet most adorable kids and a husband
that was just as bad as my kids. Jasper matched our kids both in wits and
antics. Working from home was a hard task when they were all there, but I
wouldn’t have any other way. My family was beautiful and crazy. Just the way I
liked it.
Looking back,
it was sometimes still hard for me to believe that I’d found all of this out of
a guy walking in a coffeehouse and at times I still pinched myself. However,
every day I got with them was a miracle within itself to see their smiles and
hear their laughter. And every night I got to crawl into bed beside Jasper was
a dream come true.
“What are you
thinking about?” he’d asked one night after we’d make love.
I wrapped him
my arms, sighing, my skin still tingling from his touch. With a kiss to his
forehead, I said, “Just how lucky I am.”
“I’m the lucky
one,” he said with a kiss on my chest.
“Why?”
He looked up
from his place on my chest, his beautiful eyes gleaming in the dimmed light,
“Because you are my angel.”
“I still say
I’m lucky.” I smiled.
He chuckled,
saying, “Yeah, you are.”
And I was. I
truly was.



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